The path to justice for survivors of sexual assault is not an easy road. MORE: Monmouth U. faces federal sexual assault case. Use safe and unsafe touch. However, during the hearing Tuesday,Ohio State Sen. Sandra OBrien, R-Ashtabula, told Merryn that whileshe was sorry about what happened to her,there will always be evil in the world.. The bill had already passed the House . Families pressuring loved ones to stay quiet is not uncommon, but as I often like to tell survivors, by speaking up you are not only helping yourself heal; you will help save other children from experiencing this same horror at the hands of their abuser. I left all the fragmented sentences, misspelled words, because I wanted readers to hear the voice of a young child.. CBN News Self - Children's Advocate. I wish I could say that Erins story is uncommon, but that is far from the truth its happening right here in our own backyard, Bucco said. How do we lessen the control these pressures have on ourselves, our loved ones? She is the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety on the prevention of child sexual abuse. Walking up to a door with so many racing thoughts afraid I was not going to be believed, wondering what I was going to be asked, and so ashamed to even think about sharing the dirty secrets. The only message I got as a child came from my abusers and that was to stay silent or else, she said. The two continued to correspond for seven months. The next day they told their parents. Winds WNW at 10 to 15 mph.. How I wondered am I suppose to tell this stranger my pain when I am too ashamed to even talk in detail with my parents about it. Bad things happen to children all the time. I just wanted to get it over with.She was a forensic interviewer who had been trained to interview children who had reported abuse. Are you afraid you will lose business? Merryn: I have witnessed some lawmakers come in voting against the bill who got on their mic after hearing me testify and (told) me they had all planned to vote against this bill and that my testimony changed their mind. The areas covered by your swimsuit are not for anyone to be touching, unless mommy and daddy are helping you with a bath. My favorite story is out of my own state of Illinois (One lawmaker) had been against school mandates her entire career, and (the sponsor) warned me, she is going to get on her mic and go on about how this should not be passed, schools should not be mandated to do things, etc. And a third girl I know was also abused by him. It is my hope hearing my message today youll see the importance of what Im here to talk to you about, said Erin Merryn. She wasn't always successful. Merryn: Yes. "Growing up in the suburbs of Chicago, I met my best friend in kindergarten. She didn't want to stop visiting her friend but tried to find times when Richard wasn't around. For the next hour I relived as much as I was capable of sharing and just kept finding myself focusing on the large mirror having no clue their was a detective on the other side listening to my entire story and am very glad I did not know. So far, her story has inspired many kids to speak up about abuse, and that has led to more predators put behind bars. I came from a good home, two parents, good schools, safe neighborhood, etc. Caught you off guard? Did you have a helper or helpers in your life? I can remember that as if it happened yesterday. Forgiveness set me free. We live in a society that doesn't want to even address this issue. CBS News' Reena Ninan visited a public school in Illinois to see how the school teaches kids about safe . Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. See the sex abuse in Israel's ultra-orthodox community. Confronting him empowered me and eventually allowed me to forgive him when he wrote a letter apologizing. Erin Merryn is the author of three books about surviving incest, including "Living for Today." She also speaks nationally on the subject. After describing the difference between the truth and a lie I was asked if I agreed to tell the truth that day. She was named Glamour Magazine Woman of the Year in 2012 and a People magazine Hero Among Us for her tireless work promoting Erin's Law nationwide with a mission to our keep children safe by educating them about personal body safety. I just figured I told my mom, and I never had to talk about this again. He threatened her to stay silent so she kept her secrets locked away in her childhood diary. Its somebody they know and trust.. The man, then in his late 20s, abused her several more times in the next year, including, she says, raping her during a daytime visit when she thought he wouldn't be home. Realizing I was not a fault and learning to let go of the guilt. In a Q&A with Alaska Dispatch before boarding her flight north, Merryn wasn't shy about sharing the difficulties she's experienced, including a suicide attempt, or the one thing that happened to make her finally tell someone she was being hurt. How and when did you do it first? Why is it so difficult to talk about? Was this just bad luck? 35. "A Child's Best Defense Is Her Voice. --TV host Katie Couric, 1992, 2002, and 2006 Woman of the Year.After suffering years of sexual abuse for six years of her childhood Erin broke her silence when she was 13 at a Children's Advocacy Center. After graduating, Erin went on to earn her Masters degree in social work, but from time to time she would still consult her little pink childhood diary. While these inhumane animals may live among us, there is one sexual abuse survivor who has made it her mission to empower children about these evil, sick people and teach them about body safety. Erin has been traveling state to state testifying to lawmakers to pass Erin's law for 7 years. The family pressed charges against Brian, who ultimately admitted to three counts of sexual abuse. Erin Merryn is an author, activist, speaker, wife, and mom to young human children and a fur baby named Bailey. How? To a child who has been told so many threats to stay silent the idea of being taken to a police station can often scare a child. Forgiving him did not mean what he did was right, she stressed. God has healed me, made me whole again, and has shown me the ability to forgive, the freedom it brings yourself, and shown me my purpose in this life, and that is to give kids the voice I didn't have. tax-exempt 501(c)(4) non-profit organization. (Stacey Wescott / Chicago Tribune) During her quest,. Erin, a Chicago-area native, first introduced the legislation in Illinois, and the bill was given her namesake. It happened again after we moved away, when a cousin started abusing me in my sleep when I was 11 years old. She was taught how to ride out a tornado, instructed in the eight steps for turning down illegal drugs, and told how to react to a friendly stranger who might try to abduct her. He continued to abuse her on and off for nearly two years, she says, often at holidays and celebrations with her close-knit extended family. My sister and I both left with stuffed animals and feeling like our secret was now in good hands. Merryn lay on blankets on the floor next to Ashley, who was in her bed. ALBANY, N.Y. - The Independent Democratic Conference was joined today by Assemblyman Jeff Dinowitz, (D-Bronx), and nationally recognized anti-abuse advocate and survivor Erin Merryn to hail the passage of important legislation to stamp out child sexual abuse in New York. That is what brought Erin to tell her story at Metamora Township High School last Monday afternoon, during an all-school assembly. My sister and I were the only girls that he was around all the time. Merryn: What caused me to come forward was unfortunately finding out that my little sister was also being abused. How did you find this voice? What's your advice for sexual abuse victims who may want to come forward, but who feel the abuse is better kept secret or forgotten? Winds NW at 5 to 10 mph. She was honored for her efforts in 2012 as one of Glamour Magazines 2012 Women of the Year. I was told repeatedly by my cousin that I had no proof, that he would deny it, that no one would believe me. The only difference is now I am running from him in my dreams" (Merryn 49). Merryn: This wasn't bad luck. When all you have ever been told by an abuser is to stay silent, no one will believe you, this is our secret, you learn to believe that, and (it) makes it extremely difficult to speak up about. Erins Law soon caught on nationwide. The only difference is now I am running from him in my dreams" (Merryn 49). Now, thanks to state Sen. Anthony R. Bucco, children of the Garden State may soon benefit from Merryns harrowing experience, knowledge and hope. Learn More. Erins Law is a tax-exempt 501(c)(4) non-profit organization. They talked for hours about what had happened, and the next day told their parents about their shared horror. But nothing prepared her for two traumatizing events that have turned Merryn, now 25, into an activist, determined to prevent the same thing from happening to other children. Have there been times in your life when haven't done well? Known For. Every parent should do their homework before they send their kids anywhere. As an adult, she's reclaimed the voice her abusers tried to silence. After years as a teen struggling with nightmares and flashbacks of my abuse, attempting suicide, self-injury, etc., I decided to use that voice to confront my abuser For seven months we corresponded in letters. Childhood sexual abuse survivor turned author, speaker, child advocate and activist Erin Merryn is the founder and president of Erin's Law. Illinois is the first state by law to mandate Erins Law. She was abused. As a young child from 6 to 8 (years old), when the neighbor was abusing me, he warned me if I told anyone he would come get me; he knew where I lived. As the abuse continued, and as she was forced to see her abuser over and over again in social situations, she struggled with self-doubt, panic attacks, nightmares and the weight of whether or not to tell her . Young children tend to hear a lot of messages about avoiding interactions with people they don't know, when in reality they are far more likely to face harm from a relative or family friend. I found myself locked in bedrooms, basements, bathrooms, a car, garage and repeatedly assaulted by my cousin.. Alaska Dispatch: Do you think most lawmakers meaningfully comprehend the issue of sexual abuse? Merryn worked with U.S. He doesnt sleep out ever. This representative did get on her mic. She is not ashamed of the sexual abuse she endured as a child and, instead, feels inspired to put a face and voice on childhood sexual abuse. Merryn cautions that you can never just go by how many registered sex offenders are in your area. 25 $. Merryn advocates for sexual abuse victims. "The new bill brings a mandate," Merryn said, "mandating that all (Illinois) schools--pre-school through 12th grade--must begin next fall teaching sexual-abuse prevention education in the schools." Do not use the phrases good touch and bad touch, says Merryn. Get hyperlocal forecasts, radar and weather alerts. Merryn successfully passed it in her state of Illinois in 2013 and has been traveling from one state capital to another testifying to state lawmakers to . That happened until I was 13. I know that when theres one in four girls and one in six boys (being abused) Im not the only one standing in this room that this has happened to, Erin said of the statistics. Erins Law encourages research based curriculum, Merryn said. She is an activist against child sexual abuse as well as the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety in order to prevent child sexual abuse. [8] In November 2009, she published a second book, Living For Today, discussing earlier abuse by her neighbor. Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. They dont warn us about our own family, they dont teach us that in school, her age 12 entry stated. In 2010, Merryn helped create Erin's Law, which was the first law to be passed in the U.S. that required children to be taught sexual abuse prevention in school. www.accessonline.com/videos/ellen-degeneres-gives-internet-famous-cat-a-call-in-quarantine, www.rainn.org/news/president-signs-measures-support-state-action-prevent-and-address-child-sexual-abuse, www.accessonline.com/videos/ellen-degeneres-gives-internet-famous-cat-a-call-in-quarantine. Vermont State Board of Education has required it in schools since 2009. She is the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety on the prevention of child sexual ab Alaska Dispatch: When you broke your silence and spoke up, was it frightening? I had all the warning signs of an abused kid -- labeled behavior(ally) and emotionally disturbed, given an IEP (Individual Education Plan) for that behavior, I had anger problems, put my hand through a window weeks after being raped at 7 years old and threw tantrums on the floors in school. In 2013, Governor Quinn signed it into law requiring Illinois schools to teach it every single year. Last week the law passed in two more states, Virginia and Wyoming, bringing the total to 34. Children learn all kinds of safety lessons in schools, like how to deal with natural disasters, fires and strangers. She began to think about all the other prevention classes and drills she learned in school: how to say no to drugs, what to do in case of a fire, what to do in case of a tornado, how to never answer the door if parents arent home. In 2014 People magazine named her one of fifteen women changing the world along with Oprah and Hillary Clinton. Donors may not deduct contributions made to Erins Law under IRC Section 170 (c) (2). Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, and An Unimaginable Act. Merryn: I cover these two words in my second book, "Living for Today." ABC News agreed to use her pen name and a false name for the man she says abused her. In the end, he was given seven years of probation, 1,000 hours of community service, he attended a two-year sex offender program, and couldnt come within 100 feet of Erin or her sister. Merryn said she testified four times for the task force. Then, after seven months of back-and-forths, he wrote a heartfelt apology to Erin and asking for her forgiveness, but also understanding if she couldnt forgive him. He sat down in front of Merryn and put his finger to his lips signaling her to remain quiet. The place Erin reclaimed her voice and began her journey to healing. "He told me, just like in the past by this other perpetrator, 'Erin, this is our . It wasnt until Erin was 13 and found out the same thing was happening to her little sister (then age 11), that she decided she needed to speak out. Alaska Dispatch: In your quest to get Erin's Law passed in every state, you must have encountered some surprising remarks. Merryn (whose other books are Stolen Innocence and Living for Today), the mother of a toddler girl, says this is a conversation parents must have every year and often. See her personal website at ErinMerryn.net. See all See top. Two days later, their cousin was brought into the police station. The book is titled "Stolen Innocence." At a family gathering at her grandparents' lake house, she awoke in the middle of the night to find her cousin "Brian" (again, not his real name), then 13, lying next to her with his hands down her underwear. Who encouraged you to keep talking, to keep fighting? Sorry, there are no recent results for popular commented articles. You've grown into a powerful voice who is bearing witness to the nation. The girls were brought to a Children's Advocacy Center where they had to tell their stories to complete strangers, something Erin wasnt looking forward to at all. I didnt want to talk to anyone about this. These days hes almost 9 and I dont really tag along to play dates anymore, but every time I drop him off, I tell him, if you have to use the bathroom, lock the door and have privacy. In 1998 seventy five thousand six hundred and forty seven abused children were seen in one hundred and thirty nine Children's Advocacy Centers in America. Merryn: There is so much shame and stigma attached to sexual abuse. She has made it her mission in life to get this legislation passed in all 50 states. Visit sheriffalerts.com to find out if there are sex offenders in your area. Merryn is now taking her fight to the state of Alabama. It ended only after a chance conversation between Merryn and one of her sisters, who blurted out one day that their cousin Brian was "gross." Erin Merryn is a powerful speaker and advocate for countless, faceless children and adults in our country who have similarly suffered sexual abuse. Erin Elizabeth was sexually abused from 11-13 by her older cousin. The parents can then share the information that the schools provided with anyone else in their household. So many children will be protected because of her." Her dad had to sit down and have a tough conversation with his sister, and denial followed. So began her fight to bring this epidemic to the forefront, to push for every state to implement a prevention-oriented child sex-abuse program that teaches parents and school personnel how to recognize the signs of sexual abuse, and teaches kids from Kindergarten through twelfth grades techniques on how to also acknowledge abuse and tell a trusted adult. Merryn: I was terrified. [7] She published her diary detailing her cousin's abuse and her own recovery, relapse and reconciliation in book form as Stolen Innocence in 2005. But instead of destroying it, she ended up emailing her five-page account of anger and rage to her cousin, who was now attending college. People would be amazed how many people this really does affect and that they know but have never come forward. Erin Merryn is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, An Unimaginable Act, Bailey No Ordinary Cat, and The Diary of a Cat Named Carrot. But many schools, she said, are using faculty social workers and psychologists because research shows its better taught by in-house staff then outside agencies. It would have given me courage to know that I didn't have to live in constant fear that they could hurt me, and hurt me even worse if I told anyone. Immediately I thought I was being asked this question because she already did not believe me. 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